Because we eat too many doughnuts!.... Yeah really we do! Well I did anyway......
But there’s a reason for eating so many doughnuts; I NEEDED to, like REALLY needed to.
I needed the quickest sugar fix I could get to keep my brain functioning and get me through the day. Us mums are tired beyond words, we’re completely spent in every which way.
Whether your children are newborn or middle aged. If you have children you will alway be a mother...... and with that from the first moment of their conception or arrival comes stress.
Physically we’re recovering from birth. At its best we might just be a little bruised but for most we experience physical trauma of some degree. We deal with injury, blood loss, dehydration, sleep deprivation, hormonal changes and lactation all in a matter of hrs following childbirth. All of this physical stress and trauma cause nutrient deficiencies as the body uses its reserves to heal and adapt to its new role leading to more energy loss and changes in mood.
Emotionally we’re a mess. Dealing with all of the physical changes, coupled with the emotional effects of trying to meet our own (completely naive and unrealistic) expectations of motherhood ( oh and let’s not forget everyone else’s expectations too!) we simply don’t know whether we’re coming or going. If I’m honest with myself, 8 yrs on and I still find myself worrying if I’m doing it all right....... Then I remember that winging motherhood is what works for me and a happy mummy means a happy household. Whatever works for me HAS to work for my family, let’s face it..... ya mums are the ones holding it all together 😜
So In a nutshell... mums are tired (dog tired) and emotional and they need perking up (with doughnuts 🍩😁)
Physiologically we’re in a state of stress, sending our bodies into survival mode which means you either go into fight mode or flight mode.
Us fatties... we go into fight mode, meaning two things; our body thinks it needs to bulk out to protect itself from a physical fight but also it switches to survival mode because it believes it’s being starved...... and it is.......
It’s starved of sleep. This is the major biggie for mums especially new mums. Sleep deprivation is a form of torture and mums know why...... it’s hell. It causes us to step out of bed and onto the sugar rollercoaster just so we can open our eyes in the morning. Fat mums live off sugar and caffeine ..... FACT! The trouble with this is it causes our bodies to be....Starved of nutrients - and so makes fat out of what it can and holds onto it for dear life thinking it’s gonna need every last bit of energy in that fat should the nutrient deficiency continue. ( remember - although you’re filling your cake hole with doughnuts, biscuits and coffee, your body still thinks it’s being starved because it’s not receiving any nutrients that it needs. Meaning you continue to feel hungry and crave sugar cos your body thinks it wants energy when in fact it wants vitamins, minerals and nutrients ) a catch 22 situation you crave sugar first thing in the morning because you need the instant hit of energy but this then causes your blood sugar to spike and then suddenly drop, causing you to feel tired and lethargic and crave more sugar - and so the cycle continues.
It’s starved of water making it retain every drop it can. It makes sense that lactating mums need more water in their diet to account for the extra fluid that needs to be made by the body to provide the baby with milk...... now imagine that you lost a lot of blood during childbirth ( something which I feel is just not monitored or controlled enough. If at all) your water intake would have to increase to help your body create more blood.
Whether you breast fed or not, I believe the western world is chronically dehydrated from birth. We have replaced our inherent thirst sensation with the desire to eat causing the health and obesity epedemic taking over the western nations.
And most of all......
Our fat bodies are starved of Air - The one thing we really cannot live without and yet we take it for granted that we don’t even have to think about breathing. But all this stress causes our breathing to become shallow and likewise shallow breathing causes your body stress. It seems we have forgotten or unlearned the natural practice of deep diaphragmatic breathing. Instead we now hold our breathe when we’re anxious and tend to take ‘sips’ of air with a few sighs thrown in for good measure.
How do you know if you’re shallow breathing? When you take a deep breathe, notice if your chest and shoulders rise. If they do then you are shallow breathing.
And finally we are starved of movement - Because we are so tired and stressed we tend to sit on our butts and not really move....... Unless we are heading to a local coffee shop or soft play to meet up with our mummy friends to consume more caffeine and fill our cake holes......(sorry but it’s true)
The thing is..... Structure govern function. Our bodies are designed to move. If you don’t use your body for what it’s made to do then it will start to change its structure to fit its new function. If all you do is sit on the couch and eat cookies all day, your body will respond and adapt so you literally will merge with the couch and struggle to move.
So what can us mums do to get off the sugar-coaster and get a ticket on the health train to slimsville.....
It’s simple really. To get your body out of starvation mode you need to feed it...... consistently with what it needs. You need to nourish your mind and body in the following ways.
1. Get some rest even if you can’t get a full 8hrs during the night. Make time through the day to switch off all appliances and rest when your baby / child does.
2. Everyday drink 1/2 fl. oz of water for every lb you weigh - do this for a few days and you will switch your thirst sensation back on and actually start to feel thirsty despite all the water you are now drinking.
3. Nourish yourself with fruit, veg, protein and complex carbohydrates
- Place your hands over your stomach so the fingertips just touch.
- Take a deep breathe in, making your belly rise and your ribs expand (your fingertips should part approx 1 inch)
This may take a few times to learn but each time concentrate on the breathing and see if you can find you natural breathe
5. Move your body.
Walking is what your body was designed to do. Get out and walk for 30mins everyday. Come rain or shine use the time to breathe in the fresh air and nourish your mind with visualisation, gratitude and meditation. You will only have the one mind and body so cherish it with loving thoughts and praise and it will repay you with health & vitality
And finally nourish your heart with love 💞
Contact me if you want to know more about how to make positive long lasting change for your mind & body.
This is all well and good I hear you say. But what about those skinny, Minnie mums???? They must be stressed too???
The answer is, they are! They are just as stressed as you but their bodies go into flight mode. This causes them to be on constant high alert. These mums are the ones always buzzing round doing something. They struggle to stay still and are the natural runners and athletes of the world. Physically they are prone to suffer with digestive issues though.
You don’t want to!
There, that’s it..... simple really, isn’t it?
Or is it?
I think we all know it’s not that simple, but when all is said and done the real reason you’re struggling to lose weight is because in some way, more often than not, subconsciously you don’t want to change. For whatever reason, you don’t want go back to being the person you used to be when you were a size 10 ( or whatever your ideal size is) there’s some other self sabotaging fear coming into play stopping you from achieving your weight loss goals. (Or any goals in fact)
Right now you feel safe and so your survival instincts are acting as your weight thermostat to keep you right where you are. Your subconscious believes you want to stay in your current state because subconsciously you have made yourself be this way and so your subconscious wants to keep you this way because thats where it believes you want to be.
I’ll use myself as an example....
I’m currently 5+ stone overweight. Yes me, a trained fitness instructor qualified in nutrition and physical therapy and I’m overweight! Since having my boys ( who are now 6&8) I’ve steadily gained weight ( I’ll explain the reasons for this soon)
But when I found myself in a position to be able to lose weight I just couldn’t stick to anything, I rebelled against any change to my diet and lifestyle and continued to gain weight despite all my knowledge and experience. (I used to teach back to back spin classes and spend my days writing fitness programmes for clients)
I decided to practice what I preach and take a long hard look at myself.
How was my diet so much better now than when I was a size 10 but yet I’m sitting here a size 18??? I knew I needed to ask myself some questions to dig deep into my subconscious for the answers.
I realised that yes, I used to be a size 10 but back then I used to think I was fat ( I know you can all relate to that!) and I had really low self esteem. I wouldn’t let my boyfriend see me put makeup on because I thought he’d think I was ugly if I had to put makeup on and I suppose in general, I just didn’t know who I was on the inside.
Despite this I was also a HUGE flirt and loved the attention of men. I had very few girl friends but the ones I did have would be out in the clubs with me Thursday through to Sunday seeing who could “pull” the most of men. 🤦🏻♀️
It’s not surprising I seeked the validation of myself from others, specifically men, because I didn’t have the understanding and confidence in myself that I now have to not need it. I simply didn’t know who I was then and needed others to show me (so I thought)
And so, as much as I’d love to be a physical size 10 now, I don’t want to be the mental and emotional person I was when I was that size. I have the subconscious fear that if I go back to being a size 10 I will go back to being that person I was back then. As much as my conscious mind knows that’s not going to happen, my subconscious fears are sabotaging my conscious efforts to lose weight.
My subconscious fears don’t want me to attract the attention of men as I’m now a mother and wife. My fears also tell me that if I were to lose the weight I would also lose my much valued girlfriends. You see my subconscious is just trying to protect me and maintain my status quo.
Asking myself these questions, it’s quite clear why I’m not a size 10. Despite all my training and experience, my subconscious mind sabotages all my efforts to protect me from becoming the person I don’t really want to be. It associates the size I was with the experiences I had and the person I was at that body size. Despite having a great time in my 20’s it’s not the lifestyle I want for myself now.
Can you see now why you might be struggling to lose weight or maintain your weight loss?
Ask yourself what size / weight you would like to be.....
Now consider what was happening in your life when you were last that size or weight.......
Why might you not want to go back to being like that?
What part of yourself or your lifestyle back then does not fit into your life now?
Once you know your limiting beliefs relating to weight loss and size, we can get to work removing these blocks and creating new beliefs about our ideal size and weight.
Want to change your weight or size for good?
Ask yourself the questions in the post above and then contact me to learn how to create new beliefs for long lasting change
I’m currently implementing a 6 wk weight loss programme that I’ve devised to nourish my mind and body whilst clearing my negative beliefs. Check back in 6 weeks to see how I did...... the plan is to nourish the 7 areas of my being to create balance and reset my systems therefor creating natural sustainable weight loss without faddish diets and unrealistic exercise (despite my fitness training, I’m far from a fanatic when it comes to exercise. I’d much rather opt for functional exercises and walking)
Mental health is finally getting the spotlight it deserves. We have finally woken up to the fact that we are emotional beings experiencing life not only physically but mentally too.
We are more than happy to help those in physical pain and discomfort but mental and emotional pain have been brushed under the carpet for so long, I for one am glad that the carpet is now being ripped up and exposing the reality that we have all suffered at some point in our life.
The thing is, we live in a world of free information, we can learn about anything and everything at the click of a button. We teach our kids about they way of the world but rarely teach them about themselves; why they think and feel the way they do, what affects the way they think and feel and how to recognise when they don’t feel quite right within themselves.
The trouble is we’ve become so disconnected within ourselves that we are unable to recognise our own emotional states let alone educate our children as to what they are, why and how they experience them and how they can manage them.
If we taught children about their emotions we would have a generation that understands ALL emotions are normal and are experienced by EVERYBODY at some point during their lives. We could develop a generation that is understanding of one another and feels connected and that they belong. Because deep down that’s all we all want to feel...... like we are part of something greater than ourselves and that we have our place no matter how big or small. 🧡
Since my clients literally bare their body and soles to me
( did ya see what I did there 😉)
I thought it only right to bare my soul to you guys too and let you know a little about me and how I came to be the person I am now. So...... here goes
Who am I?
First and foremost I'm a Mother. My 2 boys very much keep me on my toes and have caused me my fair share of physical and emotional pain! (But that a whole other blog in itself) Having children and becoming a mother has brought a new perspective to my treatments. Enabling me to use my experience and skills for my own benefit and then pass this first hand knowledge onto my clients. To read more about my birth story and the techniques I used to have a relaxed, confident birth but also have two babies who were so content that they never cried and have grown to be intelligent, loving, intuitive boys. Look out for my upcoming post.
Obviously I’m a therapist / healer. Ever since I was a little girl I’ve wanted to help people get better. Maybe this was due to seeing my mum and pop go to the chiropractor, maybe not, but I always knew that was the sort of thing I wanted to do. I honestly don’t consider this to be my job, more of a calling. Throughout the years I’ve worked on my own mind body connections but found that this has led me to become a lot more in tune with my spiritual connections too which has enabled me to process and honour the spiritual experience I had as a teenager ( I’ll write about this soon) and led me down this path.
I’m a science geek at heart. I will chose a documentary over a soap any day and my bedtime reading frequently features physics or biology books.
People fascinate me, I am at my happiest sat with a friend people watching. We’re all so original and quirky. People really are a passion of mine.
With over 20 yrs experience working with people I suppose much like any person who has held their job for such a long period, it all becomes second nature and intuitive. I feel I've reached a point where I can't help but surrender to the inevitable evolution of my treatments. My passion now is helping my clients create long lasting mental & physical health through healing deep emotional energetic blockages.
The last 5yrs have been a time of deep healing for myself. Calling upon all my past experience and knowledge I've had first hand experience of how energetic blockages and emotional stress can cause extreme physical pain and chronic discomfort as such I had no choice but to give up work for a few years after having my second child as I was in such a bad way.
I made time to honour my intuition, emotions, family and inner needs and most importantly follow my own advice. As such I’m stronger both physically and mentally and in turn I feel this has led me to become a much better therapist and coach.
As much as I still loving giving a normal treatment, I get a greater sense of satisfaction knowing I’ve helped my clients at a deeper level. My efforts lately have been put into my workshops and online courses in the hope that I can reach more people and empower those to heal themselves.